As some of you were witness at TEC 2009[1], I have put down my work on LDAP (since its a dead protocol and all…) and decided to enter the exciting field of Cybernetics, Robotics, and Artificial Intelligence Constructs. I was secretly testing my latest secret beta of the Tracy-bot artificial intelligence construct while attending TEC 2009.
While the sheer presence of the Tracy-bot in the technical sessions with a bunch of Nerds, Geeks, and other technical folks was enough to cause some folks to guess that it was an artificial construct, others needed to see the Tracy-bot getting drinks and snacks for myself and my friends as well as refusing to take money to go gamble to fully understand it was an artificial device. Still others were just standing around completely unaware and/or confused by the fact that the Tracy-bot was not human.
For those of you who didn’t realize that an artificial product was running around the conference, here is a picture of the secret beta product and possibly you will recall the artificial life form’s presence in several technical sessions at TEC 2009, including the Active Directory ESE (Extensible Storage Engine) session put on by none other than #2 of 6… Brett Shirley up to and including shouting out comments to have the presentation continue so Brett could show off his cool ESE Data Commit in Action Slide.
[Tracy-bot with Bwandon]
The Tracy-bot kernel is code complete. The product will not be released until there is a full Software Development Kit for complete customization via Perl scripting as well as many pluggable modules such as the Chess Expert Module, Dungeons and Dragons module, Face Book module, French Maid Module, Catholic School Girl Module, Lawn Mowing Module, Pole Dancing module, Back Scratching Module, as well as the very difficult to produce “Enjoying Watching Science Fiction Shows” module. I have completed several modules but have been having issues with the Sci-Fi shows module as it is still producing crashes and system hangs in the kernel software that result in a snore like sound output as well as unintended hand gestures that result in channel changing.
Please note that neither a .NET Framework interface nor a Power Shell provider will ever be built or supported for the Tracy-bot. The goal is to make sure the Tracy-bot doesn’t become bloated and non-performant and that requires careful programming with native code. The engine is based on the Windows Server 2008 R2 Server Core OS though a fully functional Microsoft Surface GUI not based on any .NET framework components nor Explorer has been produced and is going through intense acceptance testing. Virtual versions of the Tracy-bot are being considered for the Nintendo Wii and iPod Touch.
No requests for beta products will be accepted. This is a closed beta testing program. 🙂
joe
[1] Note that this is NOT my wrap-up on DEC/TEC/Whatever, simply a quick comment on what was going on as I have received some email on the subject and people are concerned that good non-NET based tools will no longer be produced.
I smell SkyNet all over this. I knew you had been working with them. 🙂
LDAP / LAPDANCE. There must be connection somewhere.